3 AM, Frustrated with Myself

So, I'm nominally a "leader" of the Young Adults group at my church. I say nominally, because I'm doubting whether I'm really providing that much leadership at all. The group is for church members 18-35, and is supposed to provide them with a group of caring peers and an entryway into the congregation.

One guy just sent myself and my co-leader an email, detailing his many frustration with the group. Basically, it boils down to us not really reaching out to provide spiritual and emotional connection and support to peers who need it, and also not being involved with the rest of the congregation in terms of mission, community service, participating in worship services, etc. Instead, we're basically a casual social club for games and conversation, and a fairly haphazard and exclusive club at that, seeing as only people who feel confident and interested in that ever participate, and that people actually coming to an event is a crap-shoot. These points are basically correct. My friend also listed a number of steps we could take to improve this situation, and make our group the way it's supposed to be. Again, this makes sense.

So, what's the problem? Well, I think part of the problem is with myself, and what I really want to be doing (or think I want to be doing) at this point in my life. To be perfectly honest, most of the time I just want to relax, hang out, and have fun with friends. At least, that's what I end up doing, instead of all the community-building, spirit-growing, world-saving activities I think and make myself feel guilty about. Really, a good 70-80% of my motivation seems to be to just have fun and socialize--something I largely missed out on during my high school and college years, and which I now have the ability and opportunity to do.

Am I right to feel, and think, and act this way? Am I right to be basically fairly selfish, notwithstanding doing nice little things for friends and family, and donating to charities and causes, and occasionally volunteering? Should I man up, throw myself into responsibilities outside the confines of my job, and defer a lot of that youthful whimsy--"grow up" and "act like an adult"? Or is it okay for me to want to do what I want to do, and to do it, and just be happy with myself, and not worry so much about perceived obligations? And if so, should I really be in any position of so-called "leadership" in my young adults group, given that I want to make like Sheryl Crow and "just have some fun"? Or, again, is it okay for me to be the way I am, and participate and help lead and organize things, including the hard, necessary changes that need to be made, with the understanding that, hey, I'm not perfect, and I don't need to make such a big deal out of it, it won't even be that much of a sacrifice?

I'm not really sure, although I'm sure the answer lies in the questioning. I guess I have to become an adult at some point.

Feedback and suggestions are welcome. Please don't feel the need to sympathize, or whatever. Thanks.